The Morning After

No matter how big or soft or warm your bed is, you still have to get out of it.

Grace Slick, Jefferson Airplane

kidsI had the intention of going to the “organic” market this morning, but it’s 3 pm and I’m still in my pajamas.  I feel as if I gave a dinner party last night.  I woke at 10 feeling aimless and without a purpose, extremely tired, and somewhat hung over – although I haven’t had alcohol in several days.  It’s no different than the feelings after having completed a project for a client.  There isn’t a fear of “what do I do now,” but there is the anticipation of long empty hours.  I didn’t get to sleep until 3 or so as I hadn’t finished the copyright registration until midnight and that transferred into feelings of relief and excitement.  Of course, if I want anything to happen with the screenplay – such as see it to production – the major work lies ahead.  I never thought that I was writing the story for that purpose; however, the fact that I submitted it to one competition and am likely to send it to a second indicates that I want someone to read it.

I often used music while I wrote.  Sometimes it was to give me a feel for a scene – this is what so-and-so might have listened to while she went about her day, for example.  Or it created a mood, which is how I used Vocalise and Klid.  There were times when I used a song as if I were watching the film and listening to its soundtrack.

The Brazilian friends of L have returned home, L’s husband is off to England, DB is headed to the Netherlands on Wednesday, and Johan has already returned there.  The screenplay is done, my time with the NGO is winding down, I’ve already begun to catch up on long-delayed correspondence — what will become of my time?

Rachmaninov, Vocalise

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