I’m lost. And it’s my own fault. It’s about time I figured out that I can’t ask people to keep me found.
Almost all my things, with the exception of clothing and a few kitchen and grooming tools are in storage in California. I’ve looked for housing near the family in Oregon and realized that it’s beyond my budget unless I were to work and it’s highly unlikely that I’ll work for others again. I can, it’s just likely I wouldn’t get hired. I’ve thought of becoming resident in Mexico, which would allow me to move my belongings here, but my heart isn’t in that move. I don’t qualify for becoming resident in many countries (including those where I’d most like to become resident) and those in which I could qualify, I haven’t a strong desire to do so. I feel as if I’m about to jettison all that’s in storage, then living in furnished spaces as I’ve done for the past two and a half years, surrounded by nothing that’s mine except the clothes against the skin. I’ve lived without the few things I’ve collected and even were they to arrive again in my life, they might do so as strangers.